The associated reading for this reflection can be found in your Every Sacred Sunday Mass journal or online here.
“I will make you a light to the nations, that my salvation may reach to the ends of the earth.” - Isaiah 49:6
I melted as I watched my baby girl’s chest rise and fall with each breath. Her tiny hand was wrapped around my finger. In her peaceful slumber, there would be moments where a smile would light up her face, as though she was seeing heaven in her sleep. Though she had spent the first month of her life on and off a ventilator, there was no trace of fear in her. She was not worried about her needs being met. She had a deep trust that was written on her heart from the moment she was formed. She knew the Lord’s goodness and His love.
Watching her effortless surrender with each breath, I felt the Lord say, “this is how I made you too.”
Somewhere in the process of becoming an adult, the enemy found a way to drown out the Lord’s voice—to plant seeds of doubt and fear, watered by all that was in the world. Becoming a mother made me rediscover the Lord’s unconditional love. Mesmerized by the softness of my little one’s cheek, I experienced just a small fraction of what the Lord must feel for me. I marveled at how He knows the number of hairs on her head. And then I found myself struck by the truth that He has counted my tears.
In the suffering I experienced during the pregnancy, hospitalization, and the postpartum months that followed, I encountered Christ in the fullness of His love. This love was not just for me, but for every person ever created, lovingly conceived in the mind of God. All with the hopes that this love could be returned, as effortlessly and perfectly as the little one in my arms was able to. And in that love, we find our purpose: to prepare a way for the Lord to enter the mess and pain of our lives and redeem us. To remind us of that moment where He cradled us in His arms, and remember that He still does.
Abba Father, as you powerfully instilled an awareness of your love from the moment you formed St. John the Baptist, remind me also of this same love you have for me. Let it flood my heart and transform it, that I may discover the mission you have for this life of mine. A mission to a beacon of Your light wherever You plant me or send me. Amen.
Merlyn S. Manattu, MD is the daughter of a loving King, wife of an incredible husband, mother of two precious girls, and a board certified Family Medicine and Geriatric Medicine physician. Her faith has a great part in her calling, and she sees every interaction with someone in need as an encounter with Christ. She loves reading, exploring nature, cooking, and most of all, spending time with her loved ones.